You are absolutely right, the part that shames some of us, is the righteousness of one and the sadism of the other. They are the same acts on both sides. Those that are supposed 'honourable' are unwilling to admit this, and put them on a pedestal.
But as you said, this will never change, and I for one, am glad it won't. Avalon would not be Avalon if it changed in that manner.
Written by my hand on the 21st of Midwinter, in the year 1130.