Since you covet power so openly, renounce the weakness of the illuminati,
With the power of Darkness you too can overtake pacifists to get the number
one spot. With the power of Darkness you too can have a seemingly mysterious
supply of ample herbs and poisons. With the power of Darkness you too will be
rewarded with mysterious unbalancing, yet strangely satisfying boons. With the
power of Darkness you too can destroy the world, laugh in their faces whilst
they frantically scribble notes to Apollo and Genesis.
Everything you have heard is true, and that is only a fraction of the benefits
you will come to enjoy as my dedicated servant and loyal minion of Darkness.
Written by my hand on the 8th of Paglost, in the year 1146.